


Have some self respect

by octoaliencowboy



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics), Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Dick deserves to just go off, Dick is a good big brother, Gen, If the phrase ‘well that escalated quickly’ were a fic. This would be that fic, Justice for oldest siblings!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-07
Updated: 2019-12-07
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:02:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21706429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/octoaliencowboy/pseuds/octoaliencowboy
Summary: Been seeing some people on tumblr talk about how in a lot of fics Dick tends to be framed as an asshole for doing what would just be called “standing up for himself” if it were any other character. So I decided to write a fic where Dick does the yelling and then the person he’s yelling at apologizes to HIM, just for a fun little table turning moment. That person ended up being Tim, sorry Tim stans.They hug it out in the end tho!
Relationships: No Romantic Relationships - Relationship
Comments: 48
Kudos: 457
Collections: everybody loves dick





	Have some self respect

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this late last night while tired af and blasting diary of Jane on repeat but I got not one but TWO people to read it over before posting so I’m fairly certain it’s good

“Wow, that… sure is a new look.” Dick leaned in, peering closer at Tim’s new costume that was still on the form. Brown was… a choice. This whole thing certainly was… a choice. Choices were made, that was for sure. 

But Dick didn’t want to straight up say it was ugly. That would hardly be constructive. So, with a little, barely there laugh, he tried for a hint:

“Kinda disappointed you didn’t consult me about the design though, Timmy. Everyone knows I’m the family’s style icon.” 

He was expecting a couple of responses to that. Something like a snort and a ‘yeah, right’ or a jab at how the original Robin suit, or his first Nightwing suit were terrible (even though Dick would stand by the fact that those were both  _ fantastic  _ designs and he was the only one around with any taste). 

He was not expecting Tim to scoff, turn away and say, “Right, like you would have been there for me when I needed you anyway.” 

Dick stopped, not sure at first he heard that right, but no— he definitely heard that right. He twisted his head to give Tim a Look, never mind the fact that Tim couldn’t see it from the angle, both eyebrows practically disappearing into his hairline. “Excuse me? Wanna run that by me again?”

Tim sighed, visibly. Dick could see the rise and fall of his shoulders as he drew the breath in and out, way too exaggeratedly, Dick would say. Then Tim turned around with a sour look on his face. 

“Sorry, I just… maybe it’s time we talked about what happened when Bruce supposedly died.” Tim looked tired. But then, Tim always looked tired. But Dick was also tired— tired as hell, even if he never looked like he was tired. He hadn’t been sleeping enough lately. He hadn’t been eating enough lately either, but that was a whole  _ other _ mess of problems. Either way, Dick didn’t have the energy for this conversation, but he guessed that that was irrelevant, because the conversation was happening. 

“Maybe it is,” Dick responded, crossing his arms, an edge already forming in his voice. “Because that, that just now, was  _ un _ called for.” 

“Was it?” Tim narrowed his eyes at him. 

“Tim—“ 

“Because you sure as hell weren’t there for me then—“

“Are you seriously—“ 

“And I  _ needed _ you, Dick! And you never believed me when I said Bruce was alive even though I was  _ right _ , and then you took Robin from me, and went and replaced me with  _ Damian _ who didn’t even  _ deserve it and _ —“ 

“Tim!” Dick all but roared, and that sure got Tim to snap his mouth shut quick. He took but a second to feel bad about the volume, then went on to say— probably still yelling but not as thunderously— “Will you just listen for one second!” 

Tim just looked at him, eyebrows drawn and body language unable to decide if it was on the defensive or on the attack. Dick took a deep breath. 

“Tim, first of all, you can  _ not  _ talk about Damian that way.” He snapped. “Yes, Damian was aggressive, and abrasive, and disrespectful, and dangerous and violent. He was all of those things, but he was not undeserving, because he was— and still is— a  _ child _ . And children do not have to  _ earn _ love, or family, or acceptance, or safety. Deserving has nothing to do with it!” 

“I didn’t mean that! I meant Robin! You went and made him your Robin instead of me and he didn’t even know what Robin  _ means _ !” Tim interrupted. Dick shut his eyes again and massaged his temples— he was getting a headache already, he  _ knew _ he should have taken an ibuprofen that morning— yeah, he did not have the energy for this conversation. 

“Do  _ you  _ know what Robin means?”

Tim sputtered. “What kind of question is that—“ 

“Do.  _ You _ . Know. What. Robin. Means.” 

“I— that’s— that’s not even what this is about, okay! You had no right to take Robin from me, right when I’d just lost my dad for the second time—!” 

“Oh my fucking god!” Dick cut him off. He was honestly going to lose it. He was at the end of his rope here. He thought his hands might have been shaking and everything. (Hey, speaking of ibuprofen, did he remember to take all his meds that morning?) “Tim! Will you please just listen, for once, just listen!” 

This time, it seemed like Tim was going to listen. Dick tried to recentre himself, keep his cool, but it didn’t really work. 

He was so fucking tired. 

“Are you going to stop acting like you were the only one who lost Bruce!? You think you were the only one who was grieving!? Do you even know how much I gave up, so I could move back here and live Bruce’s life for him! I dropped  _ everything _ to be here! Do you have any idea how much I had on my shoulders?!”

Dick started counting on his fingers. “Taking over Batman, which I may remind you I never  _ wanted _ but what I want never matters, does it? Becoming Batman, raising Bruce’s angry and traumatized son in his place— which as much as all that work was worth it, it was  _ not  _ easy— trying to keep Jason in line which was even harder, and running Wayne Enterprises— which I could have really used your help with, by the way! But you were the one who ran away!” 

“You drove me out—“ 

“You ran away!” 

“You  _ replaced _ me!” 

“ _ You don't know a damn thing about being replaced _ !” 

The scream reverberated throughout the batcave, casting even the distant drips of water and unseen squeaking bats into deep silence. The constant hum of the batcomputer seemed to stop, and the hum of the electric lights. Even Dick held his breath as the last echo faded, and he was the source of it. He hadn’t even realized he was capable of making such a noise. 

It had just come from somewhere so primal and deep inside him he hadn’t been aware of it until it was already ripping its way out of his lungs. 

“None of you— none of you know shit!” Dick had to fight to keep his voice from shaking. Tim looked— he didn’t look scared, not quite nervous either. But he looked like he just saw something very scary, that he never wanted to see. Fine, because Dick never wanted Tim to see any of this either. 

“None of you know what it’s like to be really, well and truly, replaced. And none of you actually know what Robin means. Robin was my mom’s name for me— even when I transitioned and my parents helped me pick a new name, I didn’t want to change my name to Robin because it was just for my mom to call me, it was hers and it was special. And then when I created Robin as a vigilante, I did it to honour  _ her _ memory!” 

“Robin doesn’t belong to Batman and it never did! It belongs to me! You keep saying I had no right to take Robin from you, but the truth is I had every right, because I am the only one with the right to decide who does and doesn’t get to be Robin! And, Tim… I really believed you were ready to let go of Robin, back then. That you were ready to grow more, and move on and create your own name for yourself. And I’m glad you’re finally able to do that now. Even if the brown was a bad choice for your costume.” 

Dick could see Tim opening his mouth to respond, and was quick to shush him. “Ah ah ah, I’m not done yet. I’m still mad.” 

Tim closed his mouth back up, and Dick continued. “You say that I wasn’t there for you, but you never gave me the chance. The reason I discouraged your ‘Bruce is alive’ theories is because I  _ saw _ what happened when you lost Kon. Which is, you went bonkers and tried to clone him back to life. I didn’t think fixating on the possibility of Bruce being alive was healthy, and I didn’t want to see you go down that path again. I wanted to help you work through your grief and  _ heal _ , but I guess you weren’t interested in healing.” 

“But even when I made Damian my Robin, I still wanted you on my team. I still wanted to help you and get help from you in turn. But you were the one who left. Do you have any idea how worried I was about you when you were gone? And with everything else on my plate, while trying to deal with  _ my own  _ grief, I just couldn’t spare the time to track you down and bring you home, no matter how badly I wanted to.” 

Tim looked down at his shoes, looking pretty thoroughly admonished. But Dick still wasn’t done. 

“You and all the other kids have something in common, and that is that most of you tend to get so wrapped up in your own problems you fail to see what’s happening all around you. You’re oblivious to everyone else and whatever  _ they _ might be struggling with, because you’re so fixated on how it’s impacting  _ you _ . It’s something you probably got from Bruce.”

“Sorry…” Tim whispered. Dick pointedly did not acknowledge it, because his reflex was to say that it was okay, but it wasn’t really. But he didn’t want to say that either, because that seemed too cruel. 

Nevermind that Dick felt like being honest about his feelings and his boundaries was the same as being cruel. 

“Look,” Dick sighed, finally running out of steam. He knew he’d had a lot of frustrations pent up, but he hadn’t expected that much to come out. And now he’d gone from tired to exhausted, and felt just about ready to sleep for a week. 

“I try really, really hard to help you and the rest of the kids and Bruce. I’m here for all of you as much as I can be, I’m consistently dropping whatever I’ve got going on so I can help you. And it’s a lot. I put a lot of effort in to just holding this family together. And I really don’t appreciate when you say that I’m never there for you when you need it.” 

“That’s not what I said—“

“That is what you said. I just. It’s disheartening as hell when it seems like all my effort is wasted because you guys don’t even see all I do for you. Like, it feels really shitty actually.” 

“I’m sorry…” 

A beat of silence passed while Tim continued to look down in shame, and Dick continued to look at him, unsure of where to go from there. 

Dick wasn’t exactly a pathological liar, or even a Liar in general, but was he a generally honest person? It wouldn’t be fair to say so, with how much he hides about himself, and bottles up and pushes down for the sake of other’s comfort. This was already much more honest than he usually was, especially with his younger siblings. And even still, there was just so so much that they didn’t know. That Tim didn’t know, that none of them knew. 

And, if Dick had any say in it, they would never know. 

Another sigh escaped Dick’s lips. “Thank you for apologizing, Tim. I forgive you,” he said. Because that, at least, was the truth. 

The truth was Dick would always forgive Tim, like he would always forgive anyone in the family. No matter what they’d done to him, he would. 

Tim peeked up through his bangs. His eyes were distinctly watery, and Dick was quick to open his arms, nonverbally inviting Tim to come hug it out. 

As much as they all liked to complain, no one could pass up a Dick Grayson hug. Tim practically ran into the embrace, burying his face in Dick’s shoulder. Dick wrapped his arms around Tim’s torso and held the young man close, smiling a little to himself. 

It had felt really good to get all that off his chest, actually. He should do this whole standing up for himself thing more often. 

Maybe next he’d go tear  _ Jason _ a new one. 

**Author's Note:**

> Is that last line going to lead to another fic of this type? Maybe!


End file.
